My Poor Heart Aches
by tatterdemalion
Summary: /With every step you take.../ AU. The only thing Ivan wants is to get to know Alfred better. The only thing Alfred wants is to punch the goddamn Russki in the face. In the 'Le Lys et La Rose' universe
1. Part 1

**Title:** My Poor Heart Aches  
><strong>Author:<strong> tatterdemalion  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Matthew (Canada), Gilbert (Prussia), Ivan (Russia), Alfred (America) / Russia/America + some PruCan  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG-13  
><strong>Summary:<strong> The only thing Ivan wants is to get to know Alfred better. The only thing Alfred wants is to punch the goddamn Russki in the face. From the "Le Lys et La Rose" universe.

**Notes:** In the same universe as "I Don't Really Know How to Tell You This"

* * *

><p><em>Tuesday...<em>

"Right, boys, that's it!" Alfred yelled across the pitch, checking his watch and kicking the football once more over at Antonio, who stopped it with nimble feet. "See you tomorrow!"

There were general shouts and grumbles as the football team took down the nets, gathered the balls, and then dispersed. It was a late summer afternoon, and the sun was staining the sky orange and red.

"See you, _amigo_!" Antonio breezed past him with a friendly grin, jogging to the end of the pitch where he'd carelessly tossed his sports bag.

Alfred waved after him, kicked at the grass with his cleats, and then turned to follow the brunette.

He stopped in his tracks.

There were bleachers that stretched along the side of the pitch, ready and waiting for tomorrow's football match. No one was around the pitch at this time after school, but all the same there was someone sitting on the lowermost bench, elbows on their knees, leaning forward, watching him.

Alfred's mouth twisted into a scowl. _Seriously? This is the fourth practice he's done this!_

The boy saw Alfred looking and straightened up, now reclining against the bench. Alfred could practically _see _the smirk on his face from here.

With a surge of annoyance, Alfred gave the boy the middle finger salute.

The boy waved back with large sweeps of his arm. Snorting, Alfred turned and made his way to the other side of the pitch, taking the long way back into the school to change.

* * *

><p><em>Wednesday...<em>

Matt and Gilbert were sitting in the bleachers during one of the school's football matches, watching their team's goalie Feliciano being chewed out by his brother, when a tall, fair headed boy came and sat down heavily beside them.

They wouldn't have noticed him if he hadn't sat on Matt's hand.

"Ow, hey..." Matt said weakly, trying to tug his hand free. Even with the fact that the boy was wearing a winter jacket and scarf over his uniform, his frame was still broad and bulky, and Matt's hand remained effectively trapped.

Gilbert looked peeved. "Oi, Braginski." he snapped. "That's my boyfriend's hand you're crushing with your immense weight, do you _mind_?"

"Hm?" the boy, Braginski, looked over. "Ah, Beilschmidt, hello! This is your boyfriend? How cute!"

"Are you _deaf_, Russki?" Gilbert snapped with no trace of friendliness in his tone. "Get. Off. Mattie's. _Hand_."

Heaving an unperturbed sigh, Braginski obligingly shifted so Matt could pull his hand away.

As soon as Matt did, however, the larger boy immediately scooted back to his side.

"What is your name, friend?" he asked. Matt blinked.

"My name's Matt."

"I am Ivan!" the Russian grabbed the previously sat on hand and gave it a hearty squeeze. "I hear about you from my big sister! You know her, yes?"

"Katya? Yeah, she's in my Maths class!" Matt's face brightened, thinking of the cheery, sensitive girl. Katya was older than him but she was retaking the class this year for a better mark. Ivan looked pleased.

"And you also have brother? Alfred?" he asked again. Feeling a little more at ease after the awkward first impression, Matt nodded and pointed down to the pitch.

"Yeah, that's him right there, with Gilbert's brother!"

Gilbert, who hadn't said anything in a long time, and was clutching at Matt like he was afraid the younger blonde would disappear, now said testily, "Anything in _particular _that you wanted, Braginski?"

Matt elbowed him for his rudeness. Ivan didn't look like he'd heard that, the same smile on his face.

"Tell me about your brother." he urged. Matt was taken aback for a minute.

"Uh? Well, he - he likes playing football...and he never does his chores...and sometimes our dad threatens to send him to military school..."

"No, not like that." Ivan said evenly. "That's not very interesting. Tell me something else. Like what your brother likes to eat for dinner. Or if he likes any pretty girls. Or what he is afraid of!"

Gilbert stood, dragging Matt up with him by the elbow. "Wow, look at the time, it's been a blast." he said dryly. "C'mon Matt."

Matt was inwardly relieved for Gilbert's lack of tact - Ivan's questions, and his cheerful, condescending smile had resonated oddly in his subconscious. He let Gilbert tug him down off the bleachers and to the side of the football pitch, where Gilbert then led them around behind the bleachers.

Gilbert's face was furious. "_Fuck_, that kid is creepy!" he spat. His hand was still cupping Matt's elbow, and his thumb set to work rubbing absent circles into the blonde's flesh.

Matt must of looked bewildered, because Gilbert turned to him and ordered (Matt really shouldn't let Gilbert order him around, but for some reason it was just too attractive to berate him for it), "Stay away from that kid, Mattie. He looks all happy and shit but trust me, Braginski's a weirdo."

"Why was he asking questions about my brother?" Matt asked, glancing up. He could see sky through the slats of the bleachers, and people's feet on top of them. The sound of the match was muffled a little back here.

Gilbert shrugged, leaning against one of the metal foundations. "Beats me. I mean, they hate each other."

"Ivan and Al _hate _each other?" Matt repeated, wary of the way Gilbert was examining him. The albino took a step forward, backing Matt deeper into the shade of the bleachers and away from the chain link fence behind the bleachers, out of sight of prying eyes.

"They're always arguing about _something _in class." Gilbert explained absently, eyes glinting with something that sent simultaneous dread and excitement down Matt's spine.

"Hey, hey Mattie." Gilbert said, lips curling upwards as Matt's back hit the far back of the bleachers. "Let me see?"

With a belabored sigh, Matt loosened his tie and pulled the collar of his uniform shirt away from his neck, so that Gilbert could gaze triumphantly at the faint red mark that graced the blonde's collarbone. Gilbert gave it an almost dreamy look.

"Can I give you another one?" he asked eagerly. "Higher up this time?"

"No." Matt was quick to reply, covering it up again. "My _papa_ would make fun of me, and Dad's only _just_ let you into my room without looking like he wants to murder you in your sleep! If he sees a hickey, then you're not going to be able to even set a _foot _upstairs without Dad sending in the hounds!"

Gilbert looked like a kid who'd gotten coal for Christmas. "So not awesome!" he declared. Matt rolled his eyes.

"I'm sure you'll live."

Gilbert played with Matt's tie, a sulky pout on his face.

* * *

><p>"He was asking <em>what<em>?" Alfred demanded after the game, wiping hair back from his sweaty brow. Matt shrugged helplessly, handing his brother a water bottle as Alfred paused to wave at several girls who were shouting congratulations at him on their way past.

"Stuff like...he asked me to tell him about you. What you liked. What you were...afraid of." Matt watched his brother's mouth curl into a sneer.

"What's going on?" the younger asked, to which Alfred replied, "Nothing, just don't worry about it. He's just trying to be a bully."

"Oh." Matt frowned. Ivan didn't seem like he was trying to _intimidate_- it was how the Russian came off as seeming, yes, but it was because Ivan's attitude was so non-chalant, so careless, but with enough underlying creepiness to unnerve someone. "Okay. Hey, do you want me to wait for you so we can catch the bus - ?"

"Huh? Yeah!" Alfred had been staring off into space, but now he shook himself and was back to his same, cheerful self. "Hold on, I just need to run inside and talk to the team, then I'll get changed and we're good to go! Meet me out by the front door of the school in ten?"

"Sure." Matt smiled, pushing Ivan from his mind. "See you there, Al."

"Yup!"

But by the time Alfred made it to the front, Matt was nowhere to be seen. Huffing, Alfred dropped his bag and sat down on the front steps.

"What the hell?" he muttered to himself. "If he's with that albino again, I swear to God..."

"You are still here!"

Alfred looked up and immediately regretted it. Ivan Braginski stood above him, hands in his jacket pockets, beaming like they were long lost friends. Alfred scowled up at him.

"Yeah, Braginski, I'm still here."

"Are you waiting for your brother?" Ivan asked innocently, and smiled triumphantly when Alfred's scowl deepened.

"Yeah, I heard you were asking him questions about me?" the blonde shot back, not bothering to get to his feet. "That's not creepy at all, Braginski, really."

"I didn't think so!" Ivan agreed airily. "He seems like a very, very nice boy! I think we would have had a very interesting conversation if his little keeper hadn't stolen him away."

Well, maybe Gilbert _was _good for something after all. Alfred rose quickly, taking a step forward so the two boys stood practically toe-to-toe.

"Shove off, Braginski." he said under his breath. "What exactly are you trying to do, huh?"

"That is easy question." Ivan tilted his head, staring at Alfred with those violet eyes. "I want to get to know you better."

Ivan managed to make this line sound incredibly threatening and Alfred, caught off guard, raised his eyebrows while he struggled to find some way to respond to that.

How _do _you respond to that?

"Well, _I_ don't want to know _you _at all." he finally said petulantly. "So too bad!"

"Does not matter!" Ivan looked undeterred. "You do not need to know _me_ in order for me to know _you_."

Alfred floundered for a second. "Look, just stay away from me, all right?" he demanded. "I swear, if you even _talk _to me or my brother I'll punch you in the face."

Ivan's smile was all threats. "I would like to see you try, Alfred!" he chimed. "So I will definitely be talking to you again!"

Alfred ground his teeth in frustration, causing the other boy to laugh warmly. "You are so easy to tease!" Ivan told him. "Your face is better when it is angry, because your smile gets annoying sometimes."

Alfred surged backwards to hit Ivan when the larger boy darted away with an airy laugh.

"Bye bye, Alfred!" Ivan told him menacingly, wiggling his fingers in a goodbye. "See you in class!"

Alfred had half a mind to cuss him out, but Matt was running up to him, bag over one shoulder, out of breath and strangely flustered.

"Sorry!" the younger boy apologized, trying to catch his breath. When Alfred looked over his shoulder, Ivan was gone. "I - I was talking to Gilbert and I lost track of the - "

"Mattie." Alfred eyed his brother's neck incredulously. "Is that a _hickey_?"

Matt paled, and slapped the palm of his hand to his neck, covering the bruising spot from his older brother's eyes. "N...no?" he tried. Alfred frowned.

"Are you serious, Mattie? That's...man, I don't want to see that!"

"Let's go catch the bus!" Matt babbled, speeding ahead of his brother anxiously. Alfred followed with an angry, "You'd better not be letting him take advantage of you, Mattie, or I'll kick his ass!"

"Alfred!" Matt pleaded, walking faster. "Let's not talk about it!"

"Like hell..." Alfred grumbled, Ivan temporarily forgotten.

Neither brother noticed Ivan watching them go, head cocked in thought.


	2. Part 2

**Title:** My Poor Heart Aches (Part Two)  
><strong>Author: <strong>tatterdemalion  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Matthew (Canada), Ivan (Russia), Alfred (America); appearances by Ukraine and Belarus / Russia/America + some mentions PruCan  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG-13  
><strong>Summary:<strong> AU The only thing Ivan wants is to get to know Alfred better. The only thing Alfred wants is to punch the goddamn Russki in the face. From the "Le Lys et La Rose" universe.

**Notes:** In the same universe as "I Don't Really Know How To Tell You This".**  
><strong>

* * *

><p><em>Thursday<em>

Arthur jumped when Alfred came storming through the front door of the pub, not even bothering to say hello before heading immediately for the staircase at the back.

"What's going o - " he managed to get out before Alfred was gone.

Matt came in a few seconds later, quieter, keeping his body suspiciously tilted away from Arthur like he had been doing for the past couple of days.

"What's going on with your brother?" Arthur directed the question instead to Matt.

"Er...he got paired up for a class project with this guy he doesn't like." Matt explained hesitantly, glancing up at the ceiling. "I'll go talk to him, Dad, don't worry."

Before Arthur could say anything else, Matt was off towards the stairs too. The Englishman sighed.

Since when had his kids started parenting themselves?

And why did Matt have his collar turned up?

"Al." Matt knocked on his brother's door. "Al, talk to me, seriously. It's not that bad..."

Alfred flung his door open, blue eyes fierce. "_Not that bad_?" he repeated. "Matt, Ivan is a weird kid who started stalking me for no apparent reason other than "he wants to get to know me", and now I have to work with him on an English project! Do you know what his face looked like when the teacher paired us up? Like he'd won the fucking lottery."

Matt, lost for words, motioned weakly with his hands. "M-maybe he just really _does _want to get to know you better?" he suggested. "He's just going about it the wrong way."

Alfred snorted. "Yeah, he is." he agreed. "I don't know who told him in Russia that stalking is a good idea, but he needs to learn it_now_."

"Al, maybe working with him will be good for you." Matt suggested. "I mean, maybe this is all a misunderstanding. You don't know anything about him, so you can't really make a judgement - "

"Mattie." Alfred looked him over incredulously. "I don't care if it turns out he's not even a _communist_, that kid is a jerkface!"

"Are you living in the 60s? What's with you and communists?" Matt asked, rolling his eyes in exasperation. Alfred scowled, then grabbed his brother's collar and pulled it down away from his neck.

"Why don't you and your pale-ass boyfriend go suck on each other's necks for a bit and leave me to be the hero?" he proclaimed, then slammed the door in Matt's face.

"_Idiot_." Matt breathed, running a thumb absently over the skin of his neck.

His brother started playing Radiohead in a fashion that was decidedly too pubescent to comment on, so Matt left him alone and went to his room to play with Kuma.

In retrospect, Alfred kicked himself for not playing Radiohead louder. It would have meant a lecture from Arthur later ("no one wants to hear that garbage when they are in our pub!"), but it would have meant he wouldn't have heard the rocks hitting his bedroom window.

His first thought was that maybe Gilbert got his window mixed up with Matt's (it had happened before, much to Alfred's dismay). So he switched his music off and went to the window to tell the pale-ass creep that "_you've got the wrong window and don't even bother trying to find the right one because I'm not afraid to get my dad's shotgun!_"

Instead he cursed and nearly hit his head on the window frame.

Ivan was standing below his window with a handful of small pebbles. "Ah, this is the right room!" he said. "Good, I was worried I would get your brother instead."

"What are you doing?" Alfred demanded. "Seriously, Braginski, if you don't get outta here I'm going to kick your - "

"So loud!" Ivan marveled innocently. "I am here to talk about work, yes? We have a...project? So you will come over to my house on Friday and we will work there!"

Oh, because that was what Alfred _always_ wanted to do, be alone with his stalker in the stalker's house. "Why can't you come over to _my _house?" he asked, adding sarcastically, "It's not like you don't know where it is."

If possible, Ivan's eyes brightened. "Ah!" he chuckled. "You want me to come over to your house! I am so flattered!"

"Whoa, no!" Alfred panicked, back pedaling. "No way in hell, I'll come over to _your _house then!"

He instantly realized what had just happened as Ivan gave him a sweet smile. "That is why I like you Alfred - you are so reasonable!" he praised. "You will walk home with me after school, yes? My house is couple of minutes from school. I will meet you by your locker!"

"How do you know where my - " Alfred began, but Ivan simply waved and walked away. Just like that.

Alfred realized that he had just agreed to go over to a weirdo Russian's house in a space of less than five minutes, while hanging out of his bedroom window.

Fuck this.

* * *

><p><em>Friday<em>

Ivan was so close over Alfred's shoulder that Alfred could feel the Russian's breath in his ear.

This should not be affecting Alfred so much, but it _was_. No one else he'd ever met at this god-damn school had been so..._upfront_, so _creepily persistent _that they managed to get their way every single time. It unnerved Alfred and it also made him angry.

"Do you mind?" he snapped at Ivan, stilling his hand. Ivan chuckled.

"I am sorry," he said sincerely. "I am trying to see what you are writing."

"I am writing," Alfred ground out, "what we decided I was going to write. Have you ever heard of personal space?"

"Yes, I have heard of it." Ivan agreed pleasantly, sitting back a little in his chair and letting Alfred continued writing. Their English teacher had given them a free work period in class, in order to prepare their analysis on a scene from _Othello_, and Ivan had insisted on scooting his chair very close to Alfred to watch him write down their thoughts on _why _(as Alfred put it), "Othello was a paranoid jack ass".

"So maybe you should start respecting it." Alfred muttered feebly. "Seriously, what did they teach you in Russia, Braginski? How to freak people out?"

Ivan considered this. "I like to do the talking with people," he explained. "I like talking and laughing so I like to be around people all the time so I do not feel lonely."

This sort of confession from such a previously-menacing figure, took Alfred aback. "Well...I mean..." he grasped desperately for something. "Jeez, there has to be a line..."

"Have I crossed it?" Ivan tilted his head innocently. "You must tell me or I will not know."

Alfred felt a tic in his jaw start up. "For fuck's sake." he growled, returning to his writing. "You are so _weird_!"

After school Alfred gathered his things, told his brother he'd be home for dinner, and followed Ivan out of the school towards his house.

When Ivan's hand brushed Alfred's, the blonde boy ignored it.

When their hands brushed again, Alfred crossed his arms over his chest and continued walking. Ivan did not look affected by this rejection.

"We are almost there!" he assured Alfred, adding, "You will be staying for dinner, yes?"

Half of Alfred wanted to, since Arthur would be cooking dinner tonight. The other half immediately reminded him that this was _Ivan_. "No." he said quickly. "My dad - wants me home for dinner."

Ivan frowned. "Oh." he said. "All right. We will be quick, then."

Alfred waited awkwardly as Ivan pulled his keys from his jacket pocket. The Braginski house looked the same as all the other lower middle-class houses in _Eadem_- a small brick bungalow, with a mottled looking lawn. There was no car in the driveway.

"Are your parents home?" Alfred asked as Ivan fit his key in the lock.

Ivan's shoulders stiffened a little. "No." he finally answered. "My father is away on business, and my mother...works unusual shifts."

"Huh? What does your mother do?" Alfred pressed, following Ivan into the house. Ivan whirled on him, looking more serious than Alfred had ever seen him.

"It does not matter." he said sharply. "She works at the hospital."

"Okay." Annoyed at Ivan's sudden mood change, Alfred held his hands up. "Whatever, dude. Sorry I asked."

Then just like that, Ivan relaxed again. "I am glad you want to know me, too!" he chirped. "I knew that you would come around."

"Hey, hold on!" Alfred spoke up as Ivan disappeared into the kitchen. "It's not like I...want to get to know you, or anything! I just thought it'd be polite to ask!"

"Of course." Ivan's voice floated in from the kitchen. "Do you want something to drink?"

"...Sure." Alfred followed him into the kitchen, where the larger boy was searching in the cupboards for cups.

"We have Coke...and water...or if you like my father has vodka." Ivan offered, head still stuck in the cupboard. Alfred laughed until he realized Ivan was serious about the vodka.

"J-just Coke, thanks." he waited while Ivan filled a mug with Coke and handed it to Alfred.

"Thanks." the bespectacled boy muttered, causing Ivan's face to light up.

"All right, so you will sit with me in the living room and we will work on our project. Okay?" Before Alfred could react, Ivan had placed one large palm in the small of his back and was steering him out of the kitchen and into the living room, where Ivan's stuff was already piled next to a coffee table.

"Good!" Ivan looked pleased, like he was following a checklist of _"what to do when the person you're stalking shows up at your house to work on a project"_. As Alfred took his books out of his bag and paused to drink some of the Coke, he was aware of Ivan watching him, placidly, hands folded on the table.

"Cut that out!" he snapped, putting his book down on the living room table with more force than was necessary.

Ivan kept smiling.

"Okay, look." Alfred took a deep breath. Even if Ivan _was_a communist, communists could still listen to reason if you spelled it out for them, right?

_Right_?

"It's really unnerving when you do that and I want you to stop it."

"Stop what?" Ivan asked.

"Staring at me!" Alfred exclaimed. "Like, not just a glance, _super creepy staring_!"

"I do not think I am super creepy staring." Ivan replied mildly. "I am looking at you. You are a nice person to look at, though you are very loud and sort of obnoxious."

Alfred gaped. "There's a difference!" he protested helplessly. "Between just looking at someone and creepily staring at them!"

Ivan frowned. "You will explain it to me?" he asked. "I am not so good at seeing the difference."

"Well...you..." Alfred trailed off, grasping for words. He was interrupted when they both heard a key in the lock and a voice called, "Vanya? I'm home!"

"It is my sister." Ivan told him, and stood up. Alfred followed suit, a little confused, as Ivan brushed past him to greet Katya.

In the front hall, Katya was talking excitedly to Ivan in Russian while holding in her arms a small child, a little girl of about four years of age, with silky blonde hair in a little bow and big eyes that were fixed on Ivan.

"Evee, Evee!" the girl demanded, holding up her hands, and both siblings broke off their fast-paced talking in order to laugh.

"All right, Nataliya." Ivan said warmly. "_Up _we go!" he took the girl, Nataliya, from Katya's arms and settled her against his hip. "How was day care?"

"Mawied!" Nataliya said suddenly, chubby hand reaching up to squeeze Ivan's cheek. "Mawid, mawid, mawied!"

Ivan sighed. "Was she reading that book again?" he asked Katya, who gave an apologetic laugh.

"Her teacher says she won't put it down. Don't worry, Ivan, she just gets excited about the pictures, she doesn't _actually _know what they mean...oh!" Katya noticed Alfred hovering apprehensively in the doorway. "Hello! You're...Alfred, right? Your brother and I have a class together, such a sweet boy."

Ivan's sister Katya was a matronly looking girl with blonde hair, blue eyes in a sweet round face, and graced by God with puberty that hit way too early and left her with a pin up's body.

Or, at least most of the boys in the school called it "graced by God".

Not to Ivan's face, though.

"Yeah. Hi." Alfred waved awkwardly. "How are you?"

"Fine, fine. I have to start dinner though, so don't mind me! You and Vanya can get back to what you were doing!" Katya turned to Ivan and Nataliya. "_Natasha_, do you want to come with me and get a snack...?"

"No!" Nataliya declared, gripping onto Ivan's neck with stubborn ferocity. "Evee!"

Katya gave a tired laugh. "Okay, okay, stay with Evee." she assured her sibling, and looked at Ivan. "You can watch her while you work, right Vanya?"

"Sure." Ivan's smile was warm as he stroke Nataliya's hair. "Don't worry, big sister."

With one last smile and wave at Alfred, Katya shrugged off her jacket and hurried into the kitchen to prepare the meal.

Alfred watched as Ivan walked back into the living room and tried to put Nataliya down on the couch.

"No!" Nataliya declared, fisting her hand in Ivan's sleeve. "Evee, no!"

Ivan sighed with fond exasperation, kneeling so he and the little girl were at eye-level. "What do you want to do, _Natasha_?" he asked in a low voice.

The girl considered him, then beat her little fists against the couch cushions. "Mawied!" she exclaimed. "Get mawied!"

Ivan sighed again. "What's she talking about?" Alfred asked from the doorway, unsure if he should interrupt. Ivan looked up, as if he had forgotten Alfred was there.

"Ah." he said. "She goes to day care every day and they have this book there - I do not know what it is about, it is a picture book - but there is a picture in it, of two people getting married, and ever since then she has this idea in her head that she and I will get married." Ivan rolled his eyes fondly at his sister and swept away a few strands of silky hair that had fallen over the young girl's eyes. "It is of no concern. she will grow out of this, it is just because the picture is so pretty, I think, but it makes it hard to leave her alone. She has become very clingy."

Alfred laughed before he could stop himself. "You know," he told Ivan, "when you're not getting up in someone's personal space, you're actually pretty nice. With your sisters and everything."

Ivan's smile was soft around the edges, genuine. "You think so?" he asked. "Everybody else says that I am a - how is it said? My English is not very good - mm! I am a _creep_, yes?"

Alfred's ears burned. "Yeah." he admitted. "And you sort of are. In some cases, anyways. Like when you're following me around."

"Hm. That is interesting." Ivan considered this, still crouched down on the floor, playing with his baby sister's hair. "But it is only when you see me elsewhere than in your very narrow viewpoint do you see I'm not a creep? Yet after this is over you will go back to thinking I am a creep."

Alfred stared. "I thought you weren't very good at English." he declared. "Stop that."

Ivan's laugh was a little bitter. "All right." he agreed. "Come. You will work with me and then you will go home. Because you are happy to be rid of me, yes?"

"That's not what I - " Alfred tried but immediately Ivan had closed himself off, taken away that warmth that Alfred had seen when with his sisters. That smile was back, but it seemed a little more forced, a ploy to cover something up.

"_Othello_ is waiting, yes? Sit down, we will work. _Natasha_, птица, stay there, okay? Katya is in the kitchen if you need her."

Nataliya nodded vehemently and crossed her legs at the ankle, looking as prim and proper as a four year old can.

Alfred settled himself at the table, feeling a little bad. "Look, man, I didn't mean it." he said imploringly.

"You said it." Ivan pointed out, head cocked. "I think you are a person I believe, so when you say those things I believe you."

Alfred spent the next hour and a half with a guilty feeling in his stomach. Ivan kept a cool, cordial tone to his voice and purposely, maybe almost mockingly, skirted around Alfred when they had to pass each other.

At the beginning of the week Alfred would have been ecstatic to receive this sort of treatment from Ivan.

Now Alfred wished that he wouldn't.

* * *

><p><strong>Notes:<strong>In Russian, Ivan is pronounced "EE-vahn", so I had Nataliya call her brother "Evee" - you know, one of those things where the kid can't pronounce a name so they give them a stupid nickname that will stick with them forever? Something like that.

Also, _Natasha_ is the Russian diminutive of Nataliya. Since this is an AU both Katya and Nataliya, being Ivan's siblings, will be Russian instead of their respective nations of representation. (BEND THE RULES, IT'S NOT LIKE ANYONE WILL NOTICE). птица is the Russian word for "bird"


	3. Part 3

**Title:** My Poor Heart Aches  
><strong>Author:<strong> tatterdemalion  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Ivan (Russia), Alfred (America), Matthew (Canada); appearances by Prussia, Ukraine and Belarus / Russia/America + some mentions PruCan  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG-13  
><strong>Summary:<strong> AU The only thing Ivan wants is to get to know Alfred better. The only thing Alfred wants is to punch the goddamn Russki in the face. From the _Le Lys et La Rose_ universe  
><strong>Notes:<strong> In the same universe as _I Don't Really Know How to Tell You This_.**  
><strong>

* * *

><p><em>Saturday<em>

It is very hard to focus on your boyfriend's hands going places they definitely shouldn't, particularly when your older brother comes barging into your bedroom.

Gilbert was looking more and more pissed off each time he came over to the Kirkland-Bonnefoy place. Matt gave an irritated sigh and turned to face Alfred.

"Hey, Al, do you think you could come back - "

"I need to talk to you." Alfred said. Matt blinked.

"Right _now_?" he intoned meaningfully, with a brief nod of the head at Gilbert. Alfred nodded with enthusiasm.

"Yeah, it's really important!"

Matt debated this for a little while, then finally sighed. "Okay. Gil, I'll be right back..."

"_Verdammt_." Gilbert muttered, making a rather imploring grab at Matt's arm and kneading it with a silent plea. Matt almost reconsidered, but eventually pulled from his boyfriend's grasp and followed Alfred out into the hall.

"Matt, you remember that Russian kid?" Alfred asked, and at Matt's nod he continued, "Well, he's not that bad. I mean, he's still pretty unnerving, but he's _bearably _unnerving. You know?"

"No." Matt answered in bewilderment.

"Okay, cool." Alfred barged ahead. "So I was over at his house and I think I insulted him and now he won't talk to me."

"You - what?" Matt looked hesitantly at his brother and dared to ask, "I-isn't that what you wanted?"

"No. Well, yes. Well - I don't know, okay?" Alfred huffed in indignation. "I feel like I should apologize. What do you think?"

"If you said something to insult him then yeah, you should apologize!" Matt responded immediately. "Honestly, that's common knowledge, Al, is that what you really wanted to talk to me about?"

Alfred folded his arms tightly across his chest. "Yeah." he muttered. "Don't know what I should do. It's not like he's my friend or anything."

Matt studied his brother for a minute. "If you feel that bad about it..." he trailed off. "Then you should do the heroic thing."

Alfred's head snapped upwards. "Oh, no fair, now I _have _to apologize!" he complained. Matt laughed.

"What, just because I said it was heroic? Al, you are such a sucker!"

"Hey!" Alfred pounced and the two brothers rough-housed for a couple of seconds before Matt found himself in a headlock. "Take that back!"

"Okay, okay!" Matt exclaimed, breathless from laughter. "You're not a sucker, Al."

"Sweet." Alfred released him.

"...You're a _double _sucker!" Matt called, and dashed back to his room before Alfred could catch him.

"You are a horrible brother!" Alfred called after him, hands on his hips - he didn't look like he was going to pursue but when your brother is on the football team you don't assume you are in the clear for _anything_. Matt didn't stop running until he closed his bedroom door safely behind him.

* * *

><p>Katya let herself into her brother's room at noon to wake him up. It was only fair, she thought. She was sure Vanya didn't want to sleep the day away, and she had errands to do so she needed him to watch Nataliya. She had been worried about her younger brother - after his friend had left yesterday, Ivan had seemed very subdued, and had retired to his room early for the night, leaving her with the task of cleaning up and getting Nataliya to bed.<p>

Ivan was curled up under a mound of blankets when Katya slipped in the door, his breathing slow and steady but with just enough pause in between exhales and inhales for his sister to figure out that he was faking sleep. Katya debated flicking on the lights and thought against it.

"_Vanya_." she cooed softly. "Wake up, sleepyhead."

There was no response from the mound of covers, so Katya decided to try another tactic.

"Vanya, I know you are awake," she announced, and the mound of covers shifted a little. "If you do not get up in thirty seconds I will be forced to jump on your bed and do horrible things until you get up."

Ivan shifted again, but there was no indication he was going to get up. Katya heaved a sigh and rolled up her sleeves, readying herself.

"You forced Big Sister to do this!" she reminded him cheerfully, then pounced.

Ivan caught her around the waist before she could carry out her plan of tickling him, and instead flung the blanket over her head before mercilessly prodding her in the sides. Katya squealed with laughter.

"No fair!" she cried, trying to pull the blanket off her. "No fair, Vanya, you can't disrespect your elders like this!"

"Sorry, sister." Ivan sounded amused as she continued to claw at the blanket. "It is no fair for you to be making sneak attacks. Not so early in the morning."

"I-it's _noon_!" she spluttered, finally finding Ivan's armpits under the mess of blankets and tickling him. Ivan let out a snort of laughter.

"Early!" he countered, trying to twist away from her.

The tickle fight went on even when Nataliya came running in and launched herself into the middle and started pinching more than tickling her siblings. Ivan didn't mind because it meant he could convince Nataliya to help him gang up on Katya, and soon the little girl sat on her older sister's chest and declared the war won. Katya giggled helplessly, bouncing Nataliya in the process.

"At least it got you up!" she laughed triumphantly at Ivan, who smiled at her.

"I suppose in the end it was effective," he admitted. Katya sat up despite the valiant efforts of Nataliya to keep her down, and settled the little girl on her knee.

"Father says he will be back next Wednesday." she told him. When he simply nodded, she pressed, "Are you all right, Vanya?"

"I am fine." came her brother's reply. Katya let her breath out slowly and bounced Nataliya on her knee.

"No, you are not." she replied. "Give me some credit, I have known you for a while. Is it because of your friend from school? Alfred?"

"No." Ivan insisted resolutely - then he paused and admitted, "Yes."

"Ah." Inside, Katya was secretly thrilled. _Score one for Big Sister Intuition!_"Did you two have a fight?"

"We didn't." Ivan looked troubled. "I just - realized something."

"What did you realize?" she asked. Ivan shrugged.

"That people don't like me."

"Ivan!" Katya was horrified. "Don't say that! Of course people like you!"

"People think I am a creep." Ivan affirmed. "I always knew it beforehand, and then Alfred told me. So now I know."

"Oh, Vanya!"

"Don't cry!" Ivan exclaimed, when his big sister started tearing up. "Katya, stop..."

"That's horrible! He shouldn't say that to you!" Katya blubbered. "You're such a sweet boy!"

"Katya." Ivan repeated, flushing with embarrassment. "Don't...don't, it's not that big a deal...oh, Katya..."

"You're not a creep, Ivan." his big sister told him resolutely, as Nataliya's pudgy hand came up to awkwardly wipe at her tears (smearing moisture across the lower part of her face). Ivan tried to maneuver her into a hug. "People just don't know you well enough. If they did, they'd wouldn't say that."

"But I am." Ivan admitted. "I tried - very hard, to get Alfred to like me, yes? And I tried to get to know him because I wanted to be friends. But I did it wrong."

"You can't _do it wrong_, when it comes to making friends." Katya shot back crossly, embracing her brother. Nataliya was wedged between them. "You may come off as intimidating, Vanya, but your heart is in the right place and that is all that counts. Okay?"

When Ivan didn't answer, she pulled back and confirmed, "_Okay_?"

"Okay." Ivan echoed reluctantly. "I am going to get changed."

Katya brightened. "Good!" she chirped. "_I_need to go to the store for some things, so you will watch your sister, please?"

"Okay." Ivan said again, absently. Katya beamed.

"Thank you, Vanya." she said sincerely. "Please do not be worried. Everything will work itself out."

Ivan nodded. "I hope so." he admitted.

Katya waited until her brother was changed and his teeth were brushed before leaving the house. After she left, Nataliya asked to be picked up, so Ivan bounced her in his arms as he walked idly around the house.

He suppose he shouldn't let it worry him. Besides, there were plenty of people in the school that he could talk to! Like Matthew. Matthew seemed nice - he would have to do something about that boyfriend, though.

What was unfair, Ivan thought, was that he really _did_want to be friends with Alfred.

Nataliya, by this time, had taken to pointing at things and naming them.

"Door!"

"Chair!"

"Couch!"

"Floor!"

She stabbed a chubby finger at him. "Mawied!" she finished. Ivan heaved a sigh.

"No." he said gently. "_Natasha_, no married."

"Yes!" she exclaimed. "Yes, yes! Mawied!"

"No, _Natasha_."

"Mawied!"

"No."

"Get mawied!"

"_No_."

"...wedding!"

"_Natasha_..."

When the doorbell rang, Nataliya's attention was momentarily diverted. "Doorbell!" she announced, tugging on Ivan's hair. "Go, Evee, go!"

"I'm going..." Ivan mumbled, lumbering towards the door.

When he opened the door, he almost shut it again.

"Hi." Alfred said, too brightly, too nervously. "Uh...are you busy right now?"

Ivan glanced at his little sister, who was staring blankly at this new visitor. "...No." he said finally. "I am watching my sister."

"Oh, cool!" Alfred smiled brilliantly. The intensity of that smile made something sad twist in Ivan's gut. "Can...can I come in?"

Ivan debated saying _no_. "Of course." he said instead. "Did you forget something here yesterday?"

"No, I came to talk to you." Alfred insisted as Ivan let him into the house. "Jeez, Ivan."

"And what would we have to talk about?" Ivan asked. "If you are worried about the project, don't be. We can each write something separate and one of us can combine our ideas at home..."

"Ivan." Alfred crossed his arms over his chest. "Just shut up for a moment, okay?"

Ivan let out a short laugh. "To be so rude to one whose house you are in," he said airily. "Your manners are horrible."

"I've heard that too many times for it to be insulting." Alfred waved his words away.

"Evee." Nataliya spoke up in a haughty tone only four year olds can pull off. "Wanna cookie."

"Okay, _Natasha_, I will get you a cookie." Ivan carried her into the kitchen. Alfred followed. Ivan balanced the little girl on one arm while he reached into the cookie jar. When he turned back, Alfred and Nataliya were staring at each other with utter seriousness.

Then Alfred extended his hand. "Hey, little lady!" he exclaimed. "What's your name?"

Nataliya looked at his hand. Then at his face. Then she grabbed his thumb. "Nat." she said solemnly. Alfred chuckled.

"Hiya Nat. I'm Alfred."

Nataliya blinked at him once, twice, until Ivan waved the cookie in front of her face. Then she let go of Alfred in favor of grabbing the cookie.

Alfred laughed again. "Cute kid." he told Ivan, who allowed himself a fond smile.

"She will grow up to be very beautiful, I'm sure. Like her sister."

There was a brief pause. Then Alfred coughed twice and said, "So, uh, I actually came here to apologize."

"Why?" the question was out of his mouth before Ivan could stop it.

"Why?" Alfred repeated quizzically. "'Cuz I was being rude to you yesterday!"

"Oh, I see." Ivan nodded. "It is still true, but you are sorry that it came out wrong, then."

"What? No!" Alfred looked irritated. "If you're going to twist my words, Braginski..."

"I am sorry." Ivan soothed. "Please. I don't mean any disrespect."

Alfred stepped back a little, took a breath. "No. It's fine." he said, then gave a grim laugh. "Funny how I come here to apologize and then I just get angry again." Alfred sighed, shifted on his feet. Ivan waited, sister on his hip.

"I was wrong." the bespectacled boy admitted. "Okay? There's a...lot more to you than I thought. So I'm sorry."

Ivan was silent. "Is that it?" he asked, and managed not to smile when Alfred bristled indignantly.

"Yeah, 'course that's it, you jackass! What _else _do you want me to do?"

"Take me to a movie!" Ivan suggested suddenly. "There is a good one out! One about uhm...I do not know, I think it is about a talking sparrow."

"Sparrow!" Nataliya repeated with utmost severity. Alfred sighed, and ran a hand through his hair.

"Uh. Okay." he said, and repeated, "Yeah, okay. You wanna go see a movie about a sparrow, Nat?" he asked the girl, who clapped her hands.

"Yes!" she agreed.

"Well, that settles it!" Raking a hand through his hair again, Alfred flashed Ivan a smile. "Let's go."

Ivan swallowed, lost for words at the smile, but then said, "I should probably wait for Katya to get home. She will want to know where we are going."

By the time Katya got home, arms full of groceries, she was surprised to discover her brother and his friend sitting on the floor of their living room, helping Nataliya draw with crayons on the back of colouring books. Nataliya, who had insisted on covering an entire picture of Cinderella in navy blue and smoke grey crayon, looked up from her work.

"Hi!" she squealed. "Cat, Cat!"

"Hi yourself, sweetheart!" Katya laughed, trying to juggle her groceries. "What are you guys doing?"

Nataliya held up her colouring for critique. Katya admired it as Ivan and Alfred held theirs up as well.

"Ivan, you did not colour neatly in the lines." she noticed. Ivan sulked. Alfred gloated.

"But Alfred, you are not so good with varying your colours." she continued, causing the bespectacled boy's face to fall and examine his colouring of Snow White.

"Do me!" Nataliya insisted. "Do me!"

"Ah, _Natasha_, it's beautiful!" she praised. "Truly a work of art, my little bird."

Nataliya looked extremely pleased with herself as Katya demanded her sister let her put the picture on the fridge. Ivan got up to help with the groceries as Alfred gathered up the crayons.

"...and so we wanted to go to a movie. _Natasha _wants to come, too." Ivan was saying as Alfred came back into the kitchen.

"Oh! Can I come?" Katya asked brightly. "That film looks very cute!"

Ivan looked disappointed. "Ah - of course you can come." he said. "I'm sure...Alfred, you do not mind?" he turned to the blonde boy.

"'Course not!" Alfred said. "You like talking sparrows, Katya?"

"We will see!" Katya laughed. "Uhm, I think the next showing is soon - if we start walking now, then we should make it in time. Come, _Natasha_, I will help you get your coat. Do you want the red one?"

"No! The blue one!" Nataliya decided as she let her sister lead her to the hall closet.

Ivan almost looked apologetic. "I'm sorry," he said. "My sister can be...quite exuberant."

"No, no, it's fine! Your sister is really cute!" Alfred waved it off, before realizing what he said. "Oh! Not in the "_I'd like to date her_" sort of way, more of a, "_she's sweet_". Yeah. Ha ha."

Ivan cocked an eyebrow. "I know what you mean." he assured.

_Well, that was awkward,_ Alfred thought to himself, as the siblings prepared themselves for the outing. He wondered why Ivan looked so reluctant to bring his sister with him.

* * *

><p>They made it to the movie theater just in time for the commercials to start. Alfred and Ivan sat next to each other, with Nataliya on Ivan's right, and Katya on the other side.<p>

Nataliya busied herself with her concession stand drink while Alfred watched the screen with mild interest. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Ivan turning his head as if to watch him - when Alfred glanced at him, though, the Russian's face was turned away again.

It was still unnerving. But Alfred was getting used to it.

As it turned out, the movie was not as kid friendly as they had imagined. There were several innuendoes (but what kid movie_doesn't_have innuendoes?), some violence, and a pretty tense part where the talking sparrow is pursued through a dark forest by a rabid cat.

Yeah, that's what Ivan thought. Really, the only reason he was here was because of Nataliya. And Alfred. He pursed his lips in boredom.

Speaking of Alfred...when he glanced over, the bespectacled boy's jaw was clenched, and his fingers were digging into the arm rests. Ivan resisted the urge to laugh.

"Alfred?" he asked instead. "Are you all right?"

Alfred drew a breath in through clenched teeth. "I have a bad feeling that there's going to be _ghosts_in this movie..."

On the screen, a ridiculously phosphorescent, cartoon ghost peeked its way from among the trees. Alfred ground his teeth.

"Are you afraid of ghosts?" Ivan asked mildly. Alfred glowered at him.

"No!" he declared. "They just...freak me out."

"It is a _cartoon_." Ivan pointed out. That didn't seem to lessen Alfred's glare. Smirking, the Russian turned his wrist so his palm was face up. "You can hold my hand if you get scared."

Alfred was about to respond when something jumped out of the trees on screen. Nataliya laughed in delight. Alfred jolted, and his fingers brushed Ivan's broad palm.

Both boys shivered and Alfred, avoiding Ivan's eyes, yanked his hand away and crossed his arms tightly over his chest in defiance. It was too dark to see if his face was red.

After the movie, Ivan and Katya shared a brief conversation in rapid-fire Russian, and as they walked back Katya purposely distracted Nataliya, leaving the two boys to walk behind them.

Ivan buried his hands deep into his jacket pockets. "I had a very nice time." he said honestly.

"I did too." Alfred answered. "It was...cool. Getting to know you and everything. Even if it was over a movie that wasn't very good."

"Yes." Ivan agreed. "We will have to go see a better movie another day."

Alfred's eyes lit up. "There's supposed to be a really scary horror movie coming out soon!" he said, eagerly shaking Ivan's shoulder in his excitement. "We should go see that!"

Ivan chuckled, and reminded him, "What if there are ghosts in it?"

He could have sworn Alfred's face paled a little bit. "Well, then, I'll just deal with it!" he exclaimed with confidence. "I can deal with anything!"

Ivan laughed - at Alfred's accusing scowl, he shook his head. "I believe you, friend."

Alfred rolled his eyes.

When their shoulders brushed, neither of them bothered to move away.

* * *

><p><em>Monday<em>

When Matt joined Gilbert at the lunch table, he looked like a mixture of disturbed and puzzled all rolled into one.

"What's up, kiddo?" Gilbert asked him as he sat down.

"My brother..." Matt began, causing Gilbert to roll his eyes.

"What now?"

"I don't _know_." Matt said in exasperation. "He's...he's been following me around since Sunday, asking me...asking..."

"Yeah?" Gilbert was getting impatient. "So what's he asking you?"

Matt looked horror struck at the very idea. "He's asking me how a person figures out if they're gay or not."

There was a pause. Then Gilbert started laughing.

"_Oh_. Oh, oh, Mattie, this is just too perfect - "

"Not. A. Word." Matt warned him. "Seriously, Gilbert, I don't even want to _know_what my brother is thinking."

Gilbert, however, was looking over the blonde's shoulder, over where Alfred had his arms crossed and was talking angrily to Ivan, who had a cheerful smile stretched across his face, eyes closed in pleasure.

"That's amazing." Gilbert declared. "I am going to have so much fun with this."

"Gil-l-l-l." Matt sighed. "No."

Gilbert pouted and sat back. "No fair." he complained. "No fair at all."

Matt put his head in his hand and unwrapped his sandwich instead of dignifying his boyfriend with an answer.

* * *

><p><em>END<em>

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **There's the end! Thank you all for reading and sorry I didn't reply to your reviews! It's been a really hectic time here and I get the feeling it will continue to be! You all rock :)


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